(Roger Erber spoke at the Christian Home Educators of Washington Conference 2008. He is a pastor in Illinois.)
Know that God has made each of your children with very specific, unique attributes, gifts, talents, and weaknesses. Trust that He has given you these particular children for a reason.
Onve a year, carve out a day or two with your spouse to purposefully talk about your family. Go on a retreat, or send the kids to Grandma’s.
Make a list of each child:
- Spiritual Life
- What is your child’s general sense of his/her relationship with the Lord.
- What do you as the parent need to do to guide them on this. when they are older, you can ask your children this before you go on your retreat.
- get perspectives from both parents. Look at their knowledge of:
- history of the Bible
- doctrines
- catechisms
- character
- hymns
- Character qualities-Building good habits
- make a list of all their positive and negative qualities
- ex. prompt v. tardy (set a time they must be at the table. If they are late, kitchen’s closed until the next meal.)
- ex. shy v. bold (offer table topics at the dinner table. Spotlight a child to share or make sure all children share.)
- ex. clean v. sloppy ("give" your child a jar of nickels they can have at the end of the retreat. But, a nickel will be removed every time someone else has to pick up each item the child did not take care of.)
- make a list of all their positive and negative qualities
- Academics
- do bible, history, science, read alouds together, regardless of age difference
- Separate for math and reading
- Skills-building life skills for a successful future household
- Make home projects, family projects
- Teach your kids to run their own homes.
- Physical Bodies
- Address vision, hearing, activity levels, etc.
After making a plan for the year with your spouse, have an individual conference with each child. This is a great opportunity to address difficult issues without conflict.
Have a mid-year review.
Proverbs 1:8, Proverbs 6:20 Proverbs 10, Proverbs 15, Proverbs 29 The relationship and roles of father and mother. (Father may be the head, but mother is the neck. Father makes the law, mother implements it.)
Have a daily visual schedule for the children to look at and follow.
Have a 30 minute quiet time, even with little ones. Kids need to learn to be quiet to hear God’s voice. Have a scheduled light’s out time for the whole family.
Get the TV out of the home; videos OK on occasion.
Weekly schedule-Have kids checkmakr their chores and school activities, etc. Give the list to Dad at the end of the week (or the day) to review. File away for record keeping.
God has the plan, and we may not know what it is.
Be flexible and willing to sort out what he is saying. (Illnesses, other things that take you away from academics.)
8AM-Morning family Bible reading/Devotionals 30 minutes
Add outdoor chores when applicable.